We come now to chapters 3-6 of the great model of marriage in Solomon’s Song. In 3:1-4, the wedding is approaching and the maiden has a dream brought on by a fear of losing her Beloved. She looks everywhere, finally seeks him, and takes him to her mother’s house, the most secure place she knows. Verse 5 ends the courting section with another reminder against the arousal of uncontrolled sexual passion before the right time. The wedding was almost there.
Verses 6-11 describe the wedding procession, which customarily was led by the groom to the bride’s home, when he then took her to their new home. There was then a wedding feast that lasted about a week. While the feast continued, however, the couple still consummated the marriage on the wedding night. We read the details of the wedding night in 4:1-5:1. Up to now, Solomon’s physical desire has been delicately phrased, but from here on it is open and explicit, which is totally appropriate for a married couple. I’ll leave the reader to explore the details, but Solomon thoroughly describes her body (vs. 1-7), tells her that she has “ravished [stolen] his heart” (v. 9), calls her “sister” (a very affectionate term for one’s wife in the ancient Near East, v. 10), praises her for her virginity (a “closed garden” and “sealed fountain,” v. 12-14), and then enjoys her as, to use her own delicate term, a “garden” (v. 16; 5:1). She reciprocates in verse 11 and enjoys him as well.
Starting in 5:2 and going through the rest of book, we see the maturing of the marriage. At first, however, we see a problem (vs. 2-16). While intimacy, joy, and physical desire did not fade between the couple, the “little foxes” of 2:15 silently crept in. While some view this passage as a dream, it is more likely quite real. In either case, however, it is dramatic and teaches a very important lesson. Solomon is late coming home (which is a challenge to all husbands to avoid this whenever possible), and is looking forward to being with his wife. She, however, is already in bed and groggily answers in effect, “I just don’t want to get up again.” We see, then, that he is late, and she is indifferent. Here is a challenge to every couple to take great care not to drift apart, not to take each other for granted.
Solomon doesn’t give up yet. He tries the door first, but when it doesn’t open he then surrenders.
Finally realizing what she’s done, she flies out of bed and opens the door, but he’s gone. She even smells his scent on the door handle and is in total despair. She runs through the streets looking for him but can’t find him. Finally, she asks the women of Jerusalem to help her look for him and if they find him to tell him that she is lovesick and miserable. “But what is so special about him that makes you so miserable?” they ask her. “Why is he any different then any other man?” This takes her back to her courting days, and she lists all the things about him that made her love him in the first place, ending with the words, “This is my beloved, and this is my friend.” That’s why he’s different! He is mine, he is my friend, it is to him I am committed and devoted.
“Okay, where should we look?” the women ask, as chapter 6 opens (vs. 1-3). Knowing him the way she does, it hits her, “Of course, he’s gone to his garden.” She goes to him and they are reconciled. Verses 4-10 are from his perspective. There is no bitterness and total forgiveness. He praises her and makes it clear that his love has not diminished since their first night together. Verses 11-13 are from her perspective. She is exhilarated to know that their love is still flourishing. She has no doubt that he loves her because he puts her in his chariot to make a public display of their reconciliation (v. 12). The women of the palace call to her as the chariot races by, and they can see the joy in her face (v. 13).
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